Can they please me sexually?

Can They Please Me Sexually?

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One question about marriage that singles are concerned about is “what if my spouse can’t please me sexually?”  Unfortunately this question takes precedence over financial stability, children, compatibility (outside the bedroom), dreams, aspirations, and retirement. What good is  mind blowing sex when you struggle to pay the bills on a monthly basis?

According to a blog from Huffington Post entitled: Women’s 10 Biggest Worries About Sex–And How To Ease The Anxiety:

“The inability to climax is arguably the most universal female sexual problem: Recent studies have suggested that roughly 75 percent of women can’t orgasm through penetrative sex, and 10 to 15 percent can’t orgasm under any circumstances.”

One reason women have a problem achieving an orgasm is everything being connected to their sex drive. So if there’s financial or emotional struggles, it’s hard for her to climax. So, being concerned if you can be pleased sexually first in marriage shouldn’t be your highest concern.

Some men say they want to marry a woman who is sexually experienced. I disagree with this statement because if she can “freak you out” like no one else, you have to wonder where did she learn this from?

What if two virgins married and then had sex on their honeymoon? It would be the best sex they ever had because they didn’t have anyone to compare themselves to! Looking back over my life, I wish I stayed a virgin until I met my wife. Think about how much closer you would be to your spouse if you only knew this one person sexually? I discuss this more in the blog, “Three Reasons Why You Should Marry Young.”

I know what you are saying, “I’ve had more sexual partners in my past that I won’t tell my potential spouse the exact number!” Consider this: please don’t ask your potential spouse how many sexual partners they had in the past. Whatever their answer is, it’s too much for you to handle (kill the visual)!

A woman wants a man who can cover her financially, spiritually, and to protect her. Brothers, if you are lacking in one of these areas “The Doors of The Church” (her having sex with you) will be closed! I understand why singles are so concerned about being pleased sexually because they aren’t having sex (or shouldn’t be). Ladies, I’m sure you don’t want a man who’s been with every Lisa, Tammy, and Kim.

Singles are concerned about width, length, size and positions but that gets old over time. Be concerned about being healed spiritually and mentally before you stand at the altar. Sex is good in the context of marriage and yes, God created sex!  When you can control your sexual desires while single, they can be controlled in marriage.

Guys, what will you do when it’s that time of the month for her? Can you control yourself? What happens when she’s not in the mood or some physical ailment is holding her back from pleasing you sexually?  Marriage is more than sex. After those five minutes you still have twenty three hours and fifty-five minutes in a day with the one you marry!

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Shon Hyneman

Single Father, Mentor, Blogger. The author of 5 books and founder of Never Again Ministries, a place where we can walk through life together. Shon also hosts of The Doctor of Love Show Podcast where he discusses real topics on relationships in a spiritual and practical way so you can apply it to your everyday life. You can subscribe to The Doctor of Love Show Podcast on Stitcher, iTunes, iHeartRadio and Google Play