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If you are over thirty-five years old, from this blog title alone you started singing this classic song The Message by Grandmaster Flash and The Furious Five. Basically, the song is about what goes on in their neighborhood. However, I’m taking a different approach to this.
Sing the hook along with me…
Don’t push me cause I’m close to the edge/I’m trying not to lose my head/It’s like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder how I keep from going under/
Millennials are like, what? I never heard that song before! You can watch it on YouTube here.
I’m taking a social media angle on this. Social media is a jungle and if you aren’t careful, it can take you under. Wait a minute? Can you explain this Shon? It’s ONLY social media, right? Don’t you think people take social media too seriously? How can it take you under?
C’mon dude, really?
In the song The Message, Grandmaster Flash definition of going under means dying. Yea, like six feet deep. If you aren’t careful social media can kill your character if you claim to be one person online and be someone else offline.
The social media jungle is full of (not all) people who have selfish motives. People hook up all the time via DM hoping they can make it happen (have sex). Some are married, and others will put you to the test to see if you are a man or woman of integrity. The minute you slip, people will put you on blast quick! If you aren’t careful, everything you worked hard for can be gone in an instant.
Flirting and flattery can easily go somewhere you never intended. Look at Facebook with the different emotions to choose from. Not only can you Like a picture, but you can Love a picture as well. Is that something for a spouse to take seriously if they Love a picture of someone from the opposite sex? Is that flirting? I had a conversation with a friend of mines about this topic. I didn’t think it was that deep until he broke it down for me.
Am I going too deep with this social media stuff?
Some people are naturally loving and sincere, so if they are being courteous, someone can take it the wrong way thinking they are being led on by the opposite sex. It’s like a man holding a door open for a woman. It’s not that he wants to look at her from behind or trying to flirt, but maybe he was raised to be a gentleman. Maybe her hands were full so he decided to hold the door open. If he didn’t hold the door open for her, he would be thought of as inconsiderate and without manners.
I wrote this blog especially for my relationship coaches who always get emails or inboxes from people with hundreds of relationship questions. It’s important not to spend too much time replying to emails and inboxes because there’s a danger of an emotional attachment. Just like one can cheat physically, one can cheat emotionally.
Some people just want to consume your time and get your undivided attention. They really don’t want your help because they are going to do what they want anyway. Some people aren’t happy at home so the first person that tells them how great they are or how good they look on Instagram, or how their spouse is lucky to have someone like them, they are gone with the wind…
I’ve met great people through Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Google Plus, and Instagram. There are people I’ve “known” on social media for years (but never met them in person). I’ve sold books and gained clients for my business as well. But I have to be careful who I connect with and not give off the scent that “I’m down for whatever” and that’s what get some relationship coaches caught up because they come across as the flirting type.
- A female relationship coach might use her looks or body shape to get more influence on social media.
- A male relationship coach might say all the right things for single women to say
aww, see that? He understands what I need. So he gets more followers and book sales.
This isn’t all coaches. There are some wonderful ones who REALLY care about your emotional state and want the best for you.
Be mindful when giving relationship advice via email or DM that most people are coming from a place of vulnerability, so they will melt in your hands. Never take advantage of that!
After years of relationship coaching I think:
It’s like a jungle sometimes (social media) It makes me wonder how I keep from going under!
I know it’s nothing but the grace of GodBuffer