Sex And The Church

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Like many of us, I grew up in the church and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am grateful for the influence church has had in my life. The church has been aided me in my lowest moments and has been a place of celebration in my happiest. But, I must be honest and admit church as not fully prepared me for life as a single Christian. One of the few subjects many churches and Christians tend to flee from is sex and that evidence is abundant. Growing up, the only time sex was discussed at church among the youth, was when two young girls became pregnant at the same time, which was too little, too late.

Now let’s be clear, I believe we all are sexual beings, and also believe that our sexual nature, should be explored within the covenant of a marriage. Sex is a sacred gift from God. But as great as sex is, why is it not freely discussed at church? It’s almost as if our sexual desires will only be awakened once we’re married. In fact, the only information most of us get from church about sex, is that it’s for marriage. I am positive many couples ministries speak on sex, but about the singles, the teenagers with wondering eyes, raging hormones and questions? How do we handle abstinence and celibacy? What about when we are married and have to abstain from sex?



The reality is that all of us could and still can benefit from a bible based non-judgmental discussion regarding sex with other believers. Until the church can properly handle sex with the respect it deserves, Christians will continue to seek answers from the world. You and I both know our fair share of single Christians that are sexually active. Imagine how an open dialogue regarding sex would benefit prepubertal teens and young adults? Church is the one place that we are surrounded by other believers; wouldn’t it be the ideal place to discuss ALL aspects of life including sex, abuse, masturbation, pornography, fornication and homosexuality? We all have the same struggles and we shouldn’t be ashamed. Discussing sex doesn’t okay the behavior; it educates us, so that we can be better prepared for the realities of life.


What are your thoughts?






Janay Grayson

Janay is a writer and blogger living in the Atlanta area. Please visit her blog: