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“In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over.” (1Pet. 3:1)
I’ve been married for fourteen years, and during that time, my wife has mastered the art of keeping my attention. She understands what I need and when I need it: that’s true wisdom. Wives, your husband might not like in the current season of his life what he liked five years ago. Know that he became a moving target the moment you two were married, and he is either moving forward or backward. There is no middle ground.
Set aside some time and ask your husband how you’re doing as his wife. If he feels comfortable sharing his heart with you, he will definitely give you feedback. In the meantime, here are some things that I believe are timeless when it comes to a woman being able to keep her husband’s attention:
– Respect him
The majority of today’s women really don’t understand what it means to respect their husbands (Eph. 5:33). Respecting your husband does not involve tearing him down verbally, second-guessing his decisions, disrespecting him in front of the children, or telling your girlfriends how much of screw-up he is. You will lose him fast when you subject him to those kinds of things. He needs to feel that he comes first in your life (after God), and he needs to feel like he’s your hero. Consistently respecting him will definitely keep his attention because your respect is what he needs.
-Look your best
I’m not saying you have to look like the women on TV and magazine covers but make every effort to look the best you can as his wife. Men are visual, and anything that’s visual gets our attention. The “we’re married now, so I can let myself go,” mentality is selfish. Phil. 2:4 reads, “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also the interests of others.” You’re the only woman he has for the rest of his life, so give him something exciting to look at: YOU!
-Be his “safe place”
When your husband can tell you his struggles and dreams without you destroying them and exposing what he shared with you, you are his “safe place.” A few years ago, a secular artist wrote a song called “The Diary,” and in the hook she sings, “I’ll keep your secrets, your secrets are safe with me…just look at me as the pages of your diary.” She let her man know that she wouldn’t expose the things that he struggles with. Being a safe place for your husband will keep his attention because we all have struggled in the flesh and having a wife who can pray is priceless.
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