What Example Are You Setting For Your Children?

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Children watching parentsWe as parents should prioritize our children opposed to putting our children on the back burner or look at parenting as a burden. We live in a day where our careers mean more to us than our children. We cannot make it to our son’s football games or our daughter’s cheerleader tournaments due to making deadlines at work. Think about this; why is it that we work so hard at work to please our bosses but don’t put in that kind of work at home? If we don’t meet our deadlines at work our employers fire us. If we don’t do our best job at home our spouses still love us; we need to value our families.  More than anything our children want our time and yes, children can be very time-consuming. Think about how we as parents could have turned out even better people if our parents put in the time we needed as children. God gives us stewardship not only in our finances and time, but also over our children. God wants us to raise our children like he raises us. Let’s take a look at how seriously Jesus took parenting.


Mat 18:6 But whoever shall cause one of these little ones who believe in me, to sin, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Let me repeat what Jesus said “It would be best for the person who causes one of them {Children} to lose faith to be drowned in the sea with a large stone hung around his neck.”

In other words, don’t do things to your children to make them not want to become a Christian. Don’t act like a Christian at Church and then a couple of hours later curse at the kids. Don’t act like a Christian in front of your Christian friends and then the kids see you hit their Mother the next night. That kind of behavior will make your children to lose faith. Many people refuse to become Christians or come to Church due to the behavior of their parents (or anyone confessing Christ). Jesus tells the extremity of causing your children to lose faith by saying that you’re better off “drowning in the sea with a large stone hung around his neck.”

That is not to say that our children won’t sin, but as a parent you don’t want to live a life contrary to the way you act in Church. Don’t let your Children say “If the way you act at home is supposed to be Christian, I don’t want to be one.” If there is anything that a child needs besides food and clothing, they need their parents to follow through on their word. Children need consistency:


Ps. 15:2-4 Those who obey God in everything and always do what is right, whose words are true and sincere, and who do not slander others. They do no wrong to their friends nor spread rumors about their neighbors. They despise those whom God rejects, but honor those who obey the LORD. They always do what they promise, no matter how much it may cost.


Focus on the later part of Psalms 15:4 “They always do what they promise, no matter how much it may cost.” In other words if you tell your children that you were going to something for them, follow through regardless of how you feel. Another translation reads “The one who makes a promise and does not break it, even though he is hurt by it.” Even when your promises to an engagement make it inconvenient for you and you tell someone you’re going to commit to something, do it! That is what the latter part of Psalms 15:4 talks about. When you follow through with your words it shows your children integrity. If you’re not consistent with your word then your children will grow up not believing what people have to say and they will have a hard time believing God’s word.


As Children, the closest idea of God they will see is through us. So therefore we need to resemble God’s characteristics to our Children. Parents here are some things our kids need to see us doing:

  • Kiss in front of the kids (or teenagers) every once in a while. Kids need to see that Mom and Dad are still in love. It’s ok to pat your spouse on the buns while she is cooking, if the kids see it so what; the two of you are happily married. Married and in love, we can do those things.


  • Husband, hold your Wife while the kids and the two of you watch a good family movie. (Growing up in a single parent household I knew nothing about being affectionate, my Mother had to work and pay bills. She didn’t have time to hold my Sister and me.  My Mother had to play the Father and Mother role). Years later in my marriage, Good thing had to teach me to be affectionate. A Man should come into a Marriage knowing how to be affectionate (Non-Sexual touch) to his Spouse. Men who are already affectionate are more than likely products of a two parent home and love is being displayed before him.


  • Praying. Do I need to explain why?


Those are some of the basic things kids need to see on a consistent basis. 1 John 4:18 reads “Let’s not merely say that we love each other, let us SHOW the truth by our ACTIONS.”

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Shon Hyneman

Single Father, Mentor, Blogger. The author of 5 books and founder of Never Again Ministries, a place where we can walk through life together. Shon also hosts of The Doctor of Love Show Podcast where he discusses real topics on relationships in a spiritual and practical way so you can apply it to your everyday life. You can subscribe to The Doctor of Love Show Podcast on Stitcher, iTunes, iHeartRadio and Google Play